WTA: Jelena Dokic opens up about her depression: "I almost jumped from the 26th floor"

WTA: Jelena Dokic opens up about her depression: “I almost jumped from the 26th floor”

The streak was one of the highlights of the last Australian Open. In the wake of her qualification for the quarter-finals, Alizé Cornet had paid a vibrant tribute to Jelena Dokic who was then in charge of her post-match interview and was going through difficult times in her personal life. The Australian, former world number 4, then burst into tears, thanking the Frenchwoman. But she hadn’t hit rock bottom yet, as she revealed Monday in a lengthy post on her Instagram account.

On April 28, 2022, I almost jumped from the 26th floor balcony and ended my life. I will never forget this day. Everything is blurry, everything is dark. No dial tone, no picture, nothing makes sense anymore. There are only tears, sadness, depression, anxiety and pain. The last six months have been hard“, Dokic testified bluntly, addressing his depression.

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It’s a vicious circle: I just wanted the pain and suffering to end

The subject is more than delicate among top athletes but less and less taboo as tongues have been loosened in recent months, especially in tennis through big names like Naomi Osaka or Nick Kyrgios. After this introduction, Dokic went into more detail about her experience, revealing the deep mechanisms of this mental self-destruction.

“Thank you Alizé, you make me cry”: Dokic very moved by the tribute paid by Cornet

The crying is constant, everywhere. From hiding in the bathroom at work and drying my tears so no one sees them, to crying nonstop at home between four walls. It was all unbearable. Those constant feelings of sadness and pain just won’t go away, and my life has been shattered. I blame myself, I don’t think I’m worthy of love and I’m scared. But I’m also aware that there are so many things I’m grateful for… And then I start hating myself for feeling like that. I feel like I’m ungrateful because I want to end this. It’s such a vicious circle in my head. (…) I just wanted the pain and suffering to stop.”

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If the Australian can now confide with an open heart, it is because she finally gave up committing the irreparable on this famous April 28, without really knowing how. Since then, she has been trying to climb the slope. In her text, she reveals that she is now followed by a professional and has found the desire to fight to get better. And in her quest, she hopes to inspire and help others who are going through the same ordeals.

Jelena Dokic during her 6th and last title in Kuala Lumpur in 2011

Credit: AFP

I’m writing this because I know I’m not the only one having problems. Just know that you are not alone. I’m not going to tell you that everything is fine for me now, but I’m definitely on the right track. Some days are better than others and sometimes I take a step forward and then a step back. But I fight and I believe I can get through this. I believe in the following things: there is no shame in feeling what I feel, there is no shame in feeling sad, keep fighting to come back to life. That’s what I try to do and that’s what motivates me. You can get over it, you have to keep believing. I love you all. I will come back stronger than ever“, she concluded.

A message that is certainly powerful and courageous in a period of extreme vulnerability. Increasingly discussed, the subject of mental health is also beginning to be taken into account more by authorities, including the WTA, which joined forces last March with the “Modern Health” platform, which provides more support players and initiates campaigns in this area.


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